Sunday, March 19, 2006

Few Random Thoughts...

Every time I'm on here wanting to post something, I lose my train of thought and end up not posting anything. It's quite annoying actually. I need to post but I'm not really that focused. I guess it's because last week was one of the seriously hectic and this week I'm recovering.

Last week, people have been in and out of my place everyday, not something I'm used to. Usually I'm alone enjoying the peace and quite. The kitchen is being renovated so on Tuesday people came for that. I had plans that day but it didn't work out because I had to stay at home. I wish they even finished. There were something wrong with the stuff they got and needed to be fixed. I waited and waited and they're suppose to come back again this week... Blah...

Along with that, my uncle's wife and cousin came from Qatar and stayed over my place. My cousin is getting married to a man, I'm not too sure if he'd truly make her happy. That's a whole different story that I really don't think it's my business. Every time I try to save somebody from misery they end up making me miserable if I don't get into trouble. Whatever...

I thank God, now my cousin is married and my uncle's wife stopped bothering me about getting married and how I should be a good house wife. BLAH!! That seriously worn me out. I mean I have my own belief when it comes to that but she refuses to see it and she butts in something that she has nothing to do with. My own mother doesn't even bother me with it. I seriously thank GOD for that. My mom told her not to bring the subject to me because I don't think of marriage the same way as 3/4 of the people I know.

One thing that makes me relieved with my mom is that she finally understood my point of view in marriage and she's not desperate in marrying me off. It's because I talked to her about it and she knows what I want, I guess. Communication is always good. My aunt bothers me with this to the degree I'm ready to bang my head on the wall. Yes, I'm not getting any younger but marriage isn't what I live for. I know if I ever do, it'll be a good thing because I'll have all sorts of support and vice versa. I do accept the fact that it might not happen either. It might be even better for me. It's all in hands of The All Knowing. He knows what's best for me more than I do. I do what I need to do and I accept what will come.

My uncle's wife doesn't see that though... She believes that it's my fault for not finding a husband. I don't get it. She asked me if I found somebody I really get along with. I told her, not exactly and then she asks and who's to blame if I don't get along perfectly with everybody here. I'm like what the ?!?! I have a different mentality from majority of people here and I don't think it's anybody to blame... I'm a open minded religious person who has goals in life and am working on them with passion and I allow no human to stand in my way. That's not normal in the old traditional Arab community. Girls are expected to stay at home and their goals is their families and that's it. I'm not against of having that as one goal but for me, I don't want to make it my only goal. I want to do more in helping this community than just raising a great generation. I have talents that I know I should use to serve my religion.

It just blows my mind how traditions are taking over Islamic values. I mean, a woman in Islam is free to have job and do whatever she pleases with her time as long her family does not suffer. I'm totally with this concept because a woman is the sustainer of society that starts with family in my belief and Islamic belief as well. Arab traditions is killing that important concept and is stripping women from their Islamic rights just for she can serve her husband and that's it, nothing else.

I'm nauseated by that idea. Men and women were created to complete each other not to oppress and to be oppressed. They are suppose to be a team. Each has an amazingly important role in life and build a healthy society.

I know that it is in men's nature to want be leaders and hence Islamically they are the leaders of the household but it doesn't mean that women don't have a say. They sure do have. Everything she owns belongs to her, and everything he owns also belongs to her and if he doesn't provide for her and her children, she has the right to sue him or divorce him, it's up to her.

Truly religious men who are humble and truly, fear and love the Lord, would probably treat their wives like Queens as the Prophet (PBUH) treated his wives.

When He died, he died in the arms of his wife, 'A'isha as he requested. Now how romantic is that?

They used to race and usually 'A'isha would win. So once for a week the Prophet (PBUH) fed her fattening food for a week so she can gain weight... She did and when they raced she lost. Hehehe... I love the humor in that story. It's soo cute.

Once there was a carnival sorta thing and 'A'isha wanted to see it from the window of their home. So he put up his arm up, so she can lean on it to take a look... Every once in a while He'd ask her, if she's done, and she'd reply that she's not. Then he got really tired and she said, "I got bored a while back but I just wanted to see how much you cared for me." Another sweet story...

Once, 'A'isha asked the Prophet (PBUH) "how string is your love to me?" He'd reply, "As a knot on a rope." Every once in a while She'd ask, "how's that knot doing?"

Once there was this Muslim man from the time of the Prophet (PBUH) whose wife would always yell at him. He couldn't stand it and decided to go talk to somebody about it. As he walked to Omar's (One of the Prophet's companions) home he heard his wife yelling at him too behind the closed doors. The man was bewildered and decided to go back home. Omar, heard him and so he rushed to the door to see what's wrong. So they both go for a walk and the man tells Omar, "I came to your to tell you about my wife but I see your wife is doing the same thing" Omar smiled and replied, "Our wives take a lot from us and get really stressed with their work they have in their hands. Taking their yelling is the least we can do for them"

Excuse me, if I butchered the stories especially the last one but I'm just typing them as I remember them. Anyways, the point is that if men today followed the Prophet's and His companions way women would be the happiest beings on earth.

It's interesting where this post went. I guess, this is seriously bothering me lately. The relationship between a husband and his wife is suppose to bring peace and love in the name of Allah. It suppose to make both of their lives filled with tranquility. Islamically, that's how it's suppose to be but stupid man made traditions is killing that.

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